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chaos or not to chaos... - There's blood on the moon.

About chaos or not to chaos...

Previous Entry chaos or not to chaos... Jan. 12th, 2005 @ 03:14 am Next Entry
So, things have been interesting lately. Quite honestly, it feels like I wrote in here about two or three days ago. I just feel like life hasn't stopped. The days are running together and shit like that. I've been really restless lately. I mean not like Wendi, who is plagued with...well, with the plague probably. She finally got some drugs. $135 worth of drugs...and that was after insurance did their part. She was in bed @ like 7:30 this evening and was more than likely asleep not long after that. I have been home for over three hours and I bet she has absolutely no clue. I couldn't tell you the last time she slept this soundly. She has been sick for about a month and just went to the doctor earlier today (yesterday now).

Oh, yeah...restless.

I just want to get the hell out of here, but I don't @ the same time. Do you ever get that sort of feeling and just can't seem to shake it. There is this part of me that can't wait for Wendi to graduate so we can move somewhere else and get a non-West Virginia living experience. But, then again, I love it here...I could probably stay here forever and be perfectly happy. I mean shit, I'm just under 24 years of age, have a wife, a house, two paid off cars, a cat, a college degree, a good job (with insurance...big deal in the ol' WV)...so why am I bitching?

Well, that's the thing...I'm not real sure. I just feel like I could do more. Not so much with the "things" in my life. I mean, I feel like I could do more. I feel like I am good enough @ what I do that if Wendi and I were somewhere else we could have nicer paid off cars, and nicer place to live, TWO cats, the more than one "tier" on digital cable, a better job, a wife that didn't have to work, etc. I assume you are getting the picture.

I am sure it will come with time. I think I am just spoiled because my life has moved so fast for the past six months and it is now starting to slow down a little bit. Just not used to it I guess. Eh, whatever. I'm going to bed.
I seem to be feeling: distresseddistressed
Rockin' out to: The Hives "Tyrannosaurus Hives"
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From:thefaerierealm
Date:January 12th, 2005 11:34 pm (UTC)
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*Sigh* I know, Honey. I'm sorry that I still have two semesters of school left, and that I should already be out of school but had to drop out to figure my life out. *that didn't come out right* I know that you know I am restless, very restless, I am so ready to get out of here, but there is this lil thing called school...and it is kind of in the way. Just think how quickly the past six months have gone by, hopefully the next twelve will go by just as quickly and then we can move. And you know, we are pretty lucky to have two paid off cars and a place to live, and have digital cable, and only be 24 years old. Who cares if the cars are close to dying, although you wouldn't know it by looking at my car. They still get us from point A to point B. Don't worry! You are always the one who tells me to take life one day at a time. So now take your own advice!

"a wife that didn't have to work"
Uh, I'm not sitting at home and popping out babies! :-P
From:(Anonymous)
Date:January 16th, 2005 07:00 am (UTC)
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Max,

At least you have your legs and your arms. I watched this thing on that Bryant Gumbel show on HBO, I also have cable, about a kid who didn't and even though he seemed optimistic about it, let's face it: Not have having arms and legs would fucking suck. So, since I love you, I thought that might be 4 more things to be happy about.
Jade T. Perez
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From:enjoythemouse
Date:January 16th, 2005 09:06 am (UTC)

wow

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Wow Jade...you really just put my life into perspective. And that's the kind of thing I love about you. Give my love to the Mr.
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